I left the jw about 8 years but still believed they weere the "truth" only got announced 5 or so months ago that "I am no longer a jw" so one does not know if you are Dfed. cold, etc etc, as now the WTBTS reliaze that they can be sued.
Anyway in Jan of this year accepeted Jesus into my life WOW what a difference, Christ now lives IN ME. This amazes me because i was not even looking for something and this living acceptance of me from God was even before I REALLY knew what He wanted from me. (remember as a jw, you have to go thru so many questions etc before you get baptised into THEIR religion, and have had to have been on the field for so many months etc etc).
God chooses you, you do not choose God.
Anyway, about baptizim, I dont know if this is spiritual or physical, sometimes feel the need sometimes don't. I am waiting on God to tell me.